Save Time for Teen Hobbies
It’s August, we don’t have time for anything?! It’s true. August is wrought with everything back-to-school and making the transition from summer to school brain. As a mom of three kids, I understand the struggle! However, this is the most critical time for tweens to have some quality hobby time. Hobbies are the brain’s way of taking a relaxing bubble bath, especially for the very busy brain of a tween who is navigating the very complicated terrain of a new school year.
Whether your tween likes to make friendship bracelets, draw, bake or ride bikes, these activities help balance a very stressful time of year. As parents, our job is to make sure they have all the things they need to have a great school year, but then we hand them off to the school where they extend the preparation into the real action of “doing school.” They definitely have the more difficult path!
As we work to get them back into normal sleep schedules and find time for homework, dance lessons, and all the things, let’s actually schedule in “hobby time” on the calendar. Make time for fun! There are so many reasons why this time is critical to a young tween.
Stress Relief: When a tween is engaging in a hobby, their brain is releasing both dopamine (their happy chemical) and serotonin (their calm chemical). This calming effect is critical after a long day of sitting in chairs, self-regulating, paying attention, etc. Doing something fun is a way for their brain to take a break from the hard things and find it’s healthy resting state in the afternoon and evenings. (Frankly, adults need to do this too!) I guarantee if you schedule in some hobby time between snack and homework, you’ll see the results of a rested little brain and a more pleasant tween. (Same results as a power nap for adults!)
Creativity:Most hobbies have a strong component of creativity. This is another brain break for your tween, plus it has the added bonus of allowing your tween to have power and creative control over something that has meaning to them. After a day of following rules and doing what adult ask of them, to turn the power switch over to them feels good and increases self-confidence.
Make Friends: Hobbies are a great way to make friends with people who share an interest in what you like too! Having friends outside of school is a healthy way to find social balance. Tweens who have hobby friends extend their social skills in a way that is more advanced than just making and keeping school friends. As a bonus, when school friend drama starts to flare up, they always have their outside-of-school hobby friends to turn to!
Problem Solve: Learning to solve problems within a hobby is so much more fun than learning to solve them within an academic environment. When they learn to solve problems within their hobby, it counts towards their learning process too! Don’t think all solid learning has to take place at school. Trying to figure out how to bake that perfect cake or arrange pictures despite setbacks or challenges totally counts towards their skill set.
Authentic Self: In a culture of strong media messaging, it’s nice to have something outside of the norm. Does your tween have an interest in something that isn’t so popular, maybe they like Aname or collecting coins? Guess what, that’s awesome! When I work with a tween who has an interest outside the norm, I’m so proud of them because I know they are honoring their authentic self and not just riding the wave of popular culture. While seemingly difficult or awkward for them, I promise this will serve them well as they enter full blown adolescence. Honoring your true authentic self if half the battle of those sticky teenage years. A
You might be thinking, “Ahhh, my tween doesn’t really have a hobby!” Sure theyA do and it’s easy to figure out. Ask them to make a list of the little things that bring them joy. See if they can think of about 20 things for the list. It can be anything! Playing with the dog, drinking a smoothie, getting a manicure, sitting on the porch watching the rain or making a birthday card for a friend. Anything that brings joy should be on the list. When I do this activity with clients, I chart their answers into categories: quiet time, family, friends, nature, art, food, physical, spiritual and miscellaneous. Within a few minutes, we have made a visual representation of their hobbies they didn’t even know they had! From there, we talk about how they can do more things from their list on a regular basis. So, replace the word hobby with joy and you will quickly see what hobbies are already in their brain waiting to be activated!
August is a time of new beginnings, so find time for the fun, the hobbies that are so crucial for the balancing of a tween brain. I guarantee a balanced brain will show up as a balanced tween who is ready to take on anything that school or life throws their way this year.